Y2K

I have this memory..... It was those days between the celebration of ringing in the year 2000 and the day I left for my Mexico Design Trip, sometime around January 3, 2000. We really ate up those days, enjoyed them. Now with work we try to enjoy the weekends, but there was something about those breaks from school that were downright amazing. I had the day to myself, and a car, and of course I was running around doing things to get ready, but I also wanted to do something just for me before I ran to another country to help others and lived with a large group of people.

I chose Alki. It's a beach in the Seattle area. It's such a pretty place, lots of action but the view of the city can be just stunning. I got out and walked to my favorite areas- the quieter neighborhoods where moss and concrete looked soft, clapboard needed re-staining, and the staircases went into the water for low tide days. It was chilly and windy, I'm sure I was wearing my favorite windbreaker or fleece. And just enjoying the day. I brought a sketchbook but I'll have to see if I can find the sketch. Life was about to get crazy and it was nice to just center myself.

I think I need an Alki some days, a place to go to just re-align. Re-center. And chill out for just a bit. No glass of wine. No friends time. Not physically intense, just a leisurely walk. And quiet salty air to clear the lungs.

Y2K is one of those words the kids will come across and ask "what did you do for the year 2000?" Well, we partied like it was 1999 of course! We got a hotel room for a few days in a nice place, they had a huge event with a swing dance band and a salsa band, and a dinner as if you were attending a wedding. It was a lot of fun and I think there was a lot of alcohol. Yes, it was definitely there. Tipsy, Jorge and I stepped away from the partying for a bit and went to the lobby. There was a couple there from afar, and they had a baby in a backpack carrier. We were chatting and both started getting excited, maybe this would be our year of parenthood? Oh for sure, this would be the year! The next day, that idea got tucked away somewhere but the dream was real, just not timely. We had Logan in 2003! We refer to the 7 years post-marriage and pre-kids as "our Seattle honeymoon." It was intense, emotional, and amazing. "First year, first kid- let's do this on our own." And we did. And of course, go figure, Logan was a very unsettled baby to have as a firstborn. But thank goodness I did not have a big sister or two to deal with alongside the fussiness right?!

Stepping away from gray Seattle in winter to Mexico it was chilly at first and then warmed into spring, flowers blooming, it was surreal. The colors exploded. I ended my trip with Jorge, in Mexico, visiting family and enjoying the sun after 3 months apart. He heard me speak to the cab driver in spanish, it was so much fun.

We came back and I wanted newer, better. We painted a wall bright red in our rental (whoops!) and started hunting for the next place to live. If I could settle something, it would be my intense need to keep moving forward in different things. A drive that I just cannot turn off. It gets in the way of logic. Right now for instance the best place for us is right here in this home, in this town. And yet, I spend every waking moment dreaming of more. Better/bigger home. Better things for the kids. Even the next job someday. Or the next project within my job. There is the promise of a big house to work on and I cannot wait to devour the lines and nuances of a 1909 home, to draw it to understand it to recreate it for a family living today, now. I'm not energetic in that I'd like to sit here instead of get a move on with the day, but my mind is energetic, it never settles. It is imaginative and creative and makes up whole scenarios that I play out and obsess over. I guess it's not boring? I can tell Sylvie is the same, she has a huge imagination. She however is physically energetic so maybe that helps distract from the internal chaos.

I feel a pull to a next adventure. Perhaps returning to Seattle. Perhaps somewhere new. I'm pretty set with the 3 kids we have, and Venice is no longer a baby (finally no diapers!!!!!). We have a trip booked to Disney and I'm super excited to let them experience it. But that's no the adventure I feel called to. That's a vacation from our reality. Which will still be here when we return. I want to paint our walls red. And our railings (oh wait, I did!). But in reality, I want more than a red railing. I want to feel so strongly and viscerally that seeing the moss grow makes me cry and immersing myself in a place fulfills me in a way that I long for it 14 years later. It's not about moving from family because gosh, they're the reason I moved away. I think in the  big picture, a sense of place has a huge impact on me and my soul.