When I met Logan, I was shocked. Nothing prepares you for the first sight of your child. They look nothing like you imagine. And nothing like you could have dreamt. Since he was a cesarean baby in the breech position, he chose not to squish his little head into an weird shapes, so he definitely had that "perfect newborn" look about him. I was so overwhelmed, it took me til the next day when I was in the room alone with him to break down into sobs telling him how absolutely beautiful he was out loud. It was something between a thank-you prayer to God and my first lullaby, but I will never forget those moments. It was sheer joy. And when Jorge and I drove home from the hospital, we both cried so hard we were sobbing, and our friend met us at the door and didn't even know what to do because we were both bawling, 20 minutes later! We just held each other and looked at this magnificent little being in his carseat and said over and over "He's here. We did it. He's perfect." And he was, he was our perfect little boy, our son.
When I met Sylvie, it was another surgery. I absolutely could not imagine that she would look like Logan. He was such a huge mix of myself, my husband and each of our families I did not think it was possible. She was perfect in every way and had this sweet rosebud mouth that I fell in love with immediately. The circumstances at the hospital were less than ideal. We had to share a room with a distraught couple whose baby was in the NICU. Jorge could not stay overnight to help out. And they messed a lot of things up- so I lost confidence in the staff. Not to mention, Jorge had an allergic reaction and ended up in another hospital emergency room overnight. But we were surrounded by family and could not wait to introduce our firstborn to his new sibling. I had a lot of quiet time with Sylvie and basically all she wanted was all mommy all the time. I should have known! I was sitting there hour upon hour just marveling in my daughter. She was smart, she knew right away how to let us all know what she liked (mommy's milk and mommy's arms) and what she did not (her bassinet). Two years later, it is the same. She is a complete mommy's girl and still does not like going to bed in her bed! I had flashes to the tea parties, the outings at the mall....and tried to drink in every single moment. I knew we would have a special bond, being girls. And I was so excited about it all. And calm and peaceful. And very very ready to leave the hospital and bring her home. She was my sweet angel and still is, she has us wrapped around her little finger.
Logan
Sylvie
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