Silly Sylvieisms

Sylvie: "Mom, can you cut the crusts off of my apple?"

Logan:"You're under arrest! Put your arms in the air."
Sylvie: "All of my dollies arms are in the air."
"Won't you be under arrest with me?"
Logan: "Are you a bad guy? Do you want to be in my club?"
Sylvie: "No, I'm a good guy. And I want to be in your club."
Logan: "Well only bad guys can be in my club."
Sylvie: "Well can your guy be good so I can be in your club?"
Logan: "Oh, okay, we'll be good guys and you can be in our club."

(Sees image of anything scary, say an alligator)
Sylvie: "Mom, are Alligators on our planet?"
Me: "Yes but they are only in zoos."
Sylvie: "But do they lick us? Are they nice?"
Me: "Alligators are not nice and they don't lick us. But they only live in cages at the zoo."
Sylvie: "Well DOGS are nice. They lick us. And snakes are nice, they lick us too."
Me:"Yes, snakes may have long tongues, but let's hope they don't lick us okay!?!"

Sylvie: "Mom, I wish our house looked just like this one!" (looking at the house that looks most identical to our house in the whole town).
Me: "That house really does look like our house! What is different that you like?"
Sylvie: "The door!" It was an older styles storm door with amber colored panels. Fancy!

Me:"Wow, looks like this house is getting a new driveway and garage" (looking at the mesh of metal laid over gravel waiting fora concrete pour)
Sylvie: "Or a giant 'Trapper Trapper'. You know, like to trap bugs." Heck yeah I hope it's really a giant Trapper Trapper because there won't be any bugs left in the neighborhood if they install a bug zapper that big!

We had a somewhat busy weekend so I was attempting to multi-task and dye my hair in the downstairs bathroom so I could fill the 25 minute waiting period with useful activities. Sylvie had never noticed that I dye my hair and was totally intrigued.
Sylvie:"Mom, will you look just like that lady on the box?"
Me: "No, just my hair will look like hers. I won't look like her thought."
Sylvie stares at the box thoughtfully for the entire time I dye my hair.
Sylvie: "Mom, I'm really glad you won't look like her. Her eyebrows look wrong. They look mean." She's so observant! The lady had shaped eyebrows and they were outlined with makeup and sure enough, they turned in at the center making her look meaner!